Wanna see my feet?

So, my doctor's appointment last week involved xrays of my fucked up foot. Because they are pretty cool, I thought that I would share them with you, my biggest fans!

This one is of the pretty pins in my ankle, holding it together. Thankfully I don't set off metal detectors at airports.

And the side view ...

Here are my long-ass toes. I knew they were long, but the xray makes them look like friggin' talons! You see those three little pieces of bone over my big toe? Well, they are supposed to be TWO pieces of bone and they are called the sesmaoid bones. I have three because one of mine fractured. Who knows when, but it is too late to fix it now. Oh well.

Oh. If you want to know what arthritis looks like, it is the thick white part where bones meet. Look at that same knuckle with the sesmaoid bone fragments. My ankle is also riddled with it, if you are interested.




So, there you have it. My fucked up body on film. Stay tuned. Maybe someday you'll get pics of my decrepit hands as well!

Because Mel is the coolest girl I know ...

Get Your Monster Name

Spring Training

Because today was an absolutely wonderful spring day and perfect for baseball, Kia and I went to the UNCG home opener. We sat in the sun and watched our boys in pinstripes slug away. They played Marist Red Foxes (a NY team), and won 8-3. It was a pretty great sporting experience ... until the 7th inning.

Being the first home game and early in the season, the seats were pretty empty. The green space had some people with blankets, but the section that Kia and I were seated in had maybe ten other people in it. This was wonderful because it allowed us to be good baseball fans: critiquing the wardrobe choices of the ump and players, making fun of the oh-so-crappy musical choices being played in the down time, cheering and yelling for our team, mocking the names and/or hometowns of the opposing team. It was all great fun.

At the bottom of the seventh inning, a group of six or so very Southern people sat behind us. Not a few rows behind but DIRECTLY behind. No, mind you, there were FIVE empty--COMPLETELY EMPTY--rows behind us. These people sat down and immediately began talking ... loudly. It wouldn't have been that bad (although it prevented us from discussing The Face and other fun topics) if they hadn't been COMPLETE dumb asses. Here are just a few examples of their complete idiocracy:

1. "Which ones are us?" (Clearly they are color blind and cannot tell the difference between the bright red uniforms of the Marist team and the blue and white pinstripes of the Spartans).

2. "Where is Marist?" (This wouldn't be all bad except that they pronounced in "Maaaahrist.")
3. "Shouldn't you be home cookin' pecan pies today?" (This was asked by a gentleman seated three seats away and one row down to an obnoxious woman seated directly behind me, smacking her gum loudly.)

4. "Is that their picture up there on the board? Ain't that nice? (Upon noticing the GIANT blue scoreboard.)

5. "Maaaaaaahrist musts be somewhere around here. Look at all the players from Virginia ... and Mass." (Important note: On the Marist team roster, two players are from Va. The other 95% are from Jersey, New York, Connecticut, and Pa. Do they not teach geography down here? Since when are Virginia and Mass neighboring states?)

6. "I don't got no plans." (Do I need to say more?)

Their loud conversation then moved to answering cellphones, smacking their gum in our ears, shouting to their friend seated halfway across the stadium, and being generally annoying. The worst part of it was their horribly grating Southern accents. It sets one's teeth on edge. Just when I start loving living here and really enjoying life (I even told Kia quite a few times that "This spring is going to rock!), I am thrown into the midst of those horrific Southern accents that make me miss home and the North more than anything in the world.

Because we couldn't rightly talk about them right then and there, Kia and I repeatedly exchanged annoyed glances Clearly she is ready for motherhood because, at one point, he actually said to me, "We will talk about this in the car." It almost made me pee my pants.

Hopefully those annoying rednecks won't be at next weekends game against Army. Of course, if they are, Chico will be there with me and he has absolutely no qualms against being mean to obnoxious people.

I hate Germany. But, then again, who doesn't?

This morning I was awoken by the sound of David Grey singing Babylon to me. Turns out that it was just my phone. I didn't recognize the number, but I picked up anyway.

It was Justin!! My best and oldest friend in all of the world!

He was driving home with his little baby Maddy to visit his parents. He says to me, "Do you want the good news or the bad news?" The last time he said that to me, he announced that he and his wife were preggers. I can't remember what the bad news was, so it must not have been important.

Anyway, being the pessimist that I am (I prefer the term "realist"), I opt for bad news first.

"Well, we are moving to Germany."

My response was around the range that only dogs could hear. I know this because Bailey looked up at me from her bed like, "WTF?"

"What do you mean you are moving to Germany? Why? When?"

As I bombarded him with questions, he revealed that he, Tai, and Maddy are leaving for Germany in June for about three years. THREE YEARS!! By the time I see Maddy again, she will be five. He moved to Germany before after we finished high school, and it sucked. We never saw each other, we rarely spoke on the phone. This is completely unacceptable. I cannot go for three years without seeing and/or talking to my best friend.Despite living in different states, at least we reside on the SAME CONTINENT and have opportunity to see each other once in a while. If he and the family move to Germany, those won't even be possibilities. Needless to say, a few profane four-letter words escaped my mouth and then I realized that I was on speaker.

"Language!" He sternly warns me.

"Oh sorry." I keep forgetting that he is a Grown Up with a baby now. I'm supposed to be more careful of my word choice. I usually fail miserably at this. Not just with Maddy but all small people with growing vocabularies. I feel that it is my job to provide them the fun yet practical words, even if they are socially unacceptable.

Finally, the good news is revealed. He is coming to South Carolina for about a month in April to do some training and take some officer's classes. That means that he and I will get to spend some quality time together before he leaves. Hopefully I'll get to see Maddy and Tai as well.

But still, having them far away, across an ocean, make me sad. I know it is a great opportunity for them, but still ...

Damnit, Germany! Why do you ruin everything?!