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05 June 2012

Going after what I want

I've been going through a lot of transitions lately. The Break-Up last fall was the start of it all. The result of that led to me being a stronger, more confident, and go-get-'em kind of gal. I decided at that point that no longer would I accept anything less than my realizing own happiness. That doesn't meant that I've morphed into a selfish snot, but I am living a life that prioritizes my own happiness in all ways. I'm making decisions about my life that help me find the happiness that I want and deserve. I recognize that this freedom to pursue my own happiness (as my forefathers desired for me in their very own declaration) is a direct result of having few ties that bind me down.

I'm not just rambling. I do have a point. I promise. Just wait for it ...

Most of you know how much I adore my job. I work with an amazing group of people that I am happy to call both colleagues and close friends. I love what I do everyday and the challenges that my job presents. I love the energy and excitement and spontaneity that my 6th graders supply me with each and every day. What I don't love is the bureaucracy and politics that one is often forced to face in this setting. I am horrible at playing politics because I'm not good at blowing the proverbial smoke up others' proverbial bottoms. I call it how I see it, and, more often than not, this gets me into trouble. I work hard at keeping my mouth shut, but that doesn't always work. But I'm a work in progress!

I also dislike where I am. The town where I live just doesn't suit me. Ever since I moved from the 'boro, I haven't felt a sense of belonging or fitting in. I miss being in a place with history and culture and aesthetic beauty. Everything here is cookie-cutter new and homogeneous. If I didn't have a job I liked, I would have hightailed it out of this town a long time ago. I would like to find a place that makes me feel as comfortable and at ease as my home town (just without the snow!!). I have a feeling I will continue to search and relocate until I find that place. 

But, certain recent events have kicked my wanderlust (and my desire for personal contentment) into high gear, and I'm ready to pursue my happiness in a setting that suits me better. I'm exploring potential jobs in other cities that I have fallen in love with. Moving would be hard, and I would leave many people that I love behind. But, in staying true to my recent pursuit of happiness, I'm determined to follow any leads that could potentially bring me a more full happiness. 

Long story short, with fingers crossed, I'll hopefully be relocating in the next few months to my dream city. Things are very up in the air right now, and, if things pan out, I'll share more. Hopefully tomorrow will provide a few more conclusions to my big question.
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